Here's a great idea for those of you that get tired of the constant harassment, doubt, and sarcasm from all the naysayers on the forum. Unless you live in the '70's you probably have a cell phone with a camera, albeit a crappy one....

Why don't you invest in a $20 Berkley or Rapala digital scale and simply snap a pic of the fish hanging on the scale while you're out on the lake??? You're going to release it anyway, Right???

That way it would silence all of the Doubting Thomasses on here....

So we are throwing a spinnerbait at the bank in Little Mustang last Feb when all of a sudden my partner hangs a GIANT FISH and starts yelling at me to GET THE NET!!!

He expertly pumps and reels the fish for what seems like an hour or more toward the boat. I'm keeping his chair pointed at the fish all the while the drag is smoking and I'm pouring buckets of water on it for coolant so it doesn't seize up in mid-battle....

I need to digress here to give you a little history on Tha Man Fighting the Fish... He is one of those guys that NEVER has a bad trip and ALWAYS Smokes 'em with a couple of Sevens, an Eight or a Nine. I mean the dude catches more NINE Pounders than ANYONE else I know (and I know a lot of folks), but he never takes a pic or weighs any of them.

Okay, back to the Epic Battle: As the fish nears the boat he is still in Full Panic Mode. He is barking orders at me and I can't decide whether to try to Gaff this Beast or Load the Harpoon Gun to ensure our safety.... Finally I decide the Net would be the best weapon of choice so I net the fish on the first attempt. We do the Moonwalk, High Five, Chest Bump, and five other moves I learned on Dancing With The Stars then he puts the Behemoth in the livewell and is ready to call it a day.

We calm down and just before I have to use the paddles on him (Clear!) He starts the Big Merc. I'm like, Where we going?? It's an hour before dark, these fish are about to really turn on!! He says, WE HAVE TO GO WEIGH THIS FISH NOW!!! His whole body was literally shaking... It is obviously the BIGGEST BASS HE HAS EVER CAPTURED IN 30 YEARS OF BASSING!!!!

I'm trying to tie stuff down so it doesn't fly outta the boat while we are heading back to the marina at Mach 5. He tries to plane the boat off and we start getting sprayed with water because he has left the trolling motor down. I mean, this Guy is Shaken Up! I get him to slow down enough so I can pull up the TM and we take off at breakneck speed toward LFM.... (By the way his boat is the Fastest Boat on Lake Fork too)

We load the boat quickly so the fish doesn't have to be carried the long walk from the dock to the scales and I pull him up the ramp... I am thinking Oh Brother, I hope nobody that I know sees me....

He wrestles the Beast outta the livewell and struts into the live bait room barely able to tote this Gargantuan to the scale. He sets it on the scale and we both hold our breath waiting for it to settle....

The table holding the scale is clearly about to collapse from the sheer weight of the Leviathan.... The scale flickers then finally settles on 9.27 pounds. He starts looking at the scale to see if it is set on some weird metric setting. He says, OH NO, that Can't be Right!!!

Now I'm thinking.... He sure got excited over that Nine Pounder... Hmmm....... Let's see......

I wonder if he really does catch all those 8's and 9's He calls me EVERY FREAKING MONDAY MORNING to tell me about!!!!!

This story was based on actual events that took place at Lake Fork Texas USA. The names have been changed to protect the innocent.

The moral of The Story: BUY A FREAKING $20 SCALE AND SAVE YOURSELF FROM THE EMBARRASSMENT OF LOOKING LIKE AN IDIOT IN FRONT OF PEOPLE THAT HAVE ACTUALLY SEEN A REALLY BIG BASS!!!!

I hope you've enjoyed my little tale from Lake Fork. Join us tomorrow for another chapter of, "As The Bass World Turns"

The End......



*No apology for he long read. I am at home with the flu and bored out of my mind so suffer.

EXCELLENT STORY!!! SO TRUE, SO TRUE!!!!!

Every frickin yokel I meet claims to have a caught a 10#+ bass.. seen several chit themselves when they hook a 5....


best thread of 2012

Nice read Ken

I don't take pics so I can lie. If I took pics I would be normal.

It's the same way up here. Everyone I've talked to has caught a 9 or 10 pounder in SE Kansas. Granted the state record of 13 something was caught around here but a really good fish is 6 or 7 lbs. I've taken a few of them fishing and one of us will catch a 4 pounder and they'll swear it's 7 or 8. My largest was 10.25# BUT it was caught at Purtis Creek in Texas. My largest around here is just short of eight and there haven't been a bunch of them. Same story---different state.

SE Kansas grass grower

Good story Ken....I am just the opposite...I guess way low so I can feel better about the fish when it does hit the $20 scale...like yesterday.....told Greg that fish was a solid 6 lbs...hit the scale and she was 8.75...

And yes I do owe you lunch...just say when....well just not 11,12,or 13th.....I'll be at Falcon with Ronnie Kelley chasin some toads!

great story, it drives me nuts when the guy thinks his fish was 9 pounds but he, "the guy" only weighs 175. come on, we know why women cant be carpenters, they think 10 inches is this long! lol get a scale it dosent make u a bad fisherman to not have caught a dd, just normal.

I hate you Chris! Lol I will call you next week so we can set something up.

excellent write up..

Must have been the same guy I spoke with at the gas station Saturday morning, that said he had two 10 lbers out of Squaw on Friday.....

I just smiled at him as we drove off to Ivie.

you watch Dancing With The Stars, that explains everything!

Now THAT was an entertaining read.

Classic read!

I know some of those guys. They usually drive 82mph Rangers.

Don't Be a Hater....