My wife just told me her dad my FIL has stage 4 prostate cancer. Neither of us have really dealt with a person going through cancer.
I guess we are trying to figure out if his health will go down hill where he can't take care of himself? My MIL I'm not sure if she can take care of him
like I'm guessing he will need to be taken care of.
Any advice on what me and my wife need to prepare for is greatly appreciated.

talk to his oncologist or urologist about symptoms and what to expect as far as care, they should know.

Age and health condition as of today play a huge role in the outcome and recovery. Just had a friend go through this and he is a healthy 50 year old who runs daily. He bounced back pretty quick once they got his meds figured out.

He 70 or close to it and has diabetes.

My dad has stage 3 about 7 years ago. Still going strong today. He had surgery and they removed his entire prostate. Then they put him on some drug that kills his testosterone bc that is the food source for the cancer. There are side effects obviously but he says not too bad. Better than the alternative.

My Dad is almost 80 and just beat throat cancer. Only had to do radiation and a feeding tube through his stomach for 6 months. He actually did really well. If he is in fact doing chemo, that's much tougher. Even with this Covid crud. Your MIL will have to drop him off for his treatments. In most cases she can't go in with him and THAT sucks. I got lucky with my Dad and I pray the same outcome for your FIL.

I just moved my inlaws in with me. My FIL had a stroke and my MIL has some muscle disease and she can't physically help him. Thankfully I have a large home and I work from home so I can help them.

It's tough. Our parents took care of us, time for us to repay the best we can.

This.

Also, the outcome is directly proportional to his overall health, aside from the cancer prognosis. It isn’t the end all be all, stage 4. It can be beat. 16 years ago, my wife had stage 3 breast cancer that had spread to her limp nodes. She was given 2-3 years to live....with treatment. She was otherwise is great health. We decided on very aggressive treatment and she was sick as could be during surgeries, chemotherapy, and other treatments. Two years worth.

Like I said. 16 years ago. At +13 years and she’s still having biannual checkups and so far so good.

Prayers to you and your family. The strength needed to beat this isn’t only by him. It’s a family disease and a family treatment. It does effect all of y’all.

This^^^ there are options to explore.

I don't have an answer for you but prayers for your family.

As others have said, you or your wife need to go with him to his doctor's visits....prostate cancer is not a death sentence even at stage 4. My neighbor had it and decided to undergo hormone therapy because his wife had MS and was in failing health...5 years later, it wasn't the cancer that killed him, it was his heart...he'd had a couple of heart attacks about 10 years prior and had open heart surgery, but this time he didn't make it.

Cancer sucks...lost several family members and friends to it over the years....May God bless your FIL and all that love him.

Yes, prayers for all that fight this insidious disease

Thanks, for the prayers. My wife is going with them do the next Dr. appointment and probably most of them from here on out. Not sure how true this
is but the VA Dr. said alot of guys that were in Vietnam end up with prostate cancer from Agent Orange. I thought they maybe a little far fetched but after looking it up
it say's Veterans that were exposed are at a higher risk and they are more likely to have aggressive form of disease. Some bad stuff.

Prayers up for your FIL and family

Sorry to hear about fil. I’m a Nam vet with Agent Orange problems, including prostate cancer. If possible take him to MD Anderson in Houston. Mayes clinic. Great doc there (don’t laugh) named Pisters. Done thousands of these and also lots of research.

IF and only if you think hospice Will be appropriate in the future, you can go to the hospice compare.gov website and compare hospice companies. My dad is 93, diagnosed with prostate and bladder cancer last year. He went on hospice for about six months and was discharged. We will use hospice again When that time comes.
I am his primary caregiver And it can be a challenge between my work and school schedule.
By the way, hospice has people that will come out to just talk to you in the comfort of your own home. No contracts or papers are ever signed Regarding that information session.They just offer information on what Services they may provide for your loved one.

Will be praying for you and your family.

https://www.medicare.gov/hospiceCompare/