Well, well, well, I'm willing to take off the bandanna and be proud to tell all y'all I'm not dead and now I'm stronger than ever!

This time last year, I was ankle cuffed to a bed in JPS. Why? Because on November 18 I told my Wife I would grant her years long demand for a divorce after she stole my pain medication from me and crossed from emotional to physical abuse, and I offered a fair split of assets and custody. On November 26 I was served with divorce papers (filed Nov 2) and a Restraining Order with both a false claim and rife with character assassination. I realized it was my out from my Marriage, but also my relationship with my Parents, who, with my Wife, conspired behind my back and broke a promise to me that they would never discuss my Marriage amongst the three of themselves. My Parents knew she filed for divorce before I did. I caught them lying.

So, imagine a really beaten down dude - you know you saw some really heinous emotional [censored] going on here from me over the years - pushed to the very edge...and he runs. He tries his best to say "Fine, I'll go, just let me be okay and don't hurt me" but it turns out that's not the goal. The goal? The goal is to make me go into rehab, again, take more pills, stop enjoying life, let my Wife gain another 25 pounds and get diabetic, and go back to work until I die. That's not love. That's...

I tried to run. They starved me. $40 a day allowance in February living in a rental Mitsubishi Outlander and sleeping in the Buccee's Alliance parking lot, surviving on tortillas and the Drake song about losing friends and finding peace. Every "friend" I helped with their divorces, their problems, like 40 years invested in those relationships pile them up, not a single one would let me use a couch. Not a single one would help me get a Motel 6 room. Before the rental car?

I was on foot in Denton and stayed the night at the Clayton Motel. About $80 I think. She apologized that there was no key for the room but it did lock. Hey, it was me, 45 pound backpack, and my Heritage Les Paul. It beat the street...

Which is where I ended up New Years Eve 2022. Because of my health condition, on my second visit to Tarrant County Corrections, they were ready and decided not to leave me in solitary all night like the first time. No, I went into the system and sure enough, when I finally got to the real medical personnel...they called leadership to ask them to let me bond out for $250 on my Class B, but because of my ability to demand respect only when given and not vice versa, three Sheriffs passed and so..."It's going to be $75,000 just for the Ambulance ride to get him there, then in the ER, then..." became your problem, citizens of Tarrant County.

It does get worse though - Deputy Childs flipped out on New Year's Eve Day and, well, maybe some of you can get into records! I've already turned in my charges as of September 2023 and not a single goddamn note, message, call, telegram, pony express, or stripper-gram from Tarrant County Internal Affairs about why Deputy Childs stole my prescription from my hands while I was in custody then lied to her superior officer and told me she was going to add charges that were never added...oh, wait, I was told she doesn't work there anymore?

So my Wife with the help of my Parents and so-called friends betray me. They use the legal system to help. I am on a first name basis with Officer 2197 of the Southlake PD and if you ever meet Trailer Trash Bueller I hope you ask him for a discount on a Hugbox. Petrovich, oh, I'm sorry, SARGE PETROVICH worked his way to finally getting the "I'm sorry your grandfather died in a concentration camp, he really should have been more careful on that guard tower" treatment when pretending to help. He almost helped but had to hang up just before he could, usual emergencies in Southlake where there's an Isreal-Palestine proxy-conflict going on, right?

At JPS, I had a CT scan. In the past year I have been through 4 ER visits, one at Baylor in Dallas. Here's the thing - after getting free of legal hassles, getting the $77,000 cut of the house after I cleaned out all my retirement funds to survive (and even letting her keep her half of TRS ugh) - I landed in Oak Cliff. Near Bishop Arts District. Alone, adrift...but a place to stay as of June 2023 for 3 months, the opportunity to extend. 3 months worked. Now February on the books, about the time I should hear back from Social Security Disability...

I'm down to my last $1,000. I do have the title for my car. Because of circumstances, I live here, I have paid for the right to live here, this is my place until legally told otherwise. It's complicated.

On December 2, 2023, my body began a purge thanks to how I'd been living since June. I will post my Instagram account at the bottom of this post. I will be very clear:

Not a single medical professional discussed a severe, life-threatening, decades-long, brain, spinal, and full body infection and potential medication side-effect condition within the past year, past five years, or past 10 years and then because I started TRT, riding a Honda Grom, playing Drums, and sitting alone in the quiet in a house built in the 1930s, no radio, no Alexa, no TV, just me and the ability to live...

I've been blessed so many ways. Here in Oak Cliff, this is where I belong. My body has gone through a medical miracle. I want to see that CT scan - but I can't - the Tarrant County Sheriffs have it. The Texas Rangers won't investigate. The Southlake Police let my Parents lie to them and then gave me a warning. The systems are so awful that when I finally go peace and quiet and strength of self, my body asked me "are you ready?" and I was like "For what?" and then it said "you remember how to puke like a rockstar? this time is different but we'll work together"

For days. Two weeks. A cycle. Learning how my body would prepare this poison, grab it, shove it through my system, and then I had to work it out. Why bother looking it up on the internet? I can tell what was happening. The best part? Unlike a hospital, I got to keep whatever the hell I wanted from my purge. Science!

I've officially declared myself a Freelance Journalist as I do get paid via my Medium account for my reporting. My IG account also is a reporting tool. My mantra is "Joy and Justice" every day.

I'm a Gonzo Journalist. I'm a mutant. I'm handicapped. I'm a world-class guitarist. I'm of the DGAF school as well.

It is with great relief and also reluctance I am sharing my IG handle, because now that I can both create and end worlds, I want help to channel those powers appropriately.

The System took my Daughter away from me, so I will make the System give Her back. My motives are pure. My willpower is bottomless now.

austin_on_guitar

Your a [censored] tweaker bro go crawl back into the hole you came out of

I’ll just summarize so everyone else doesn’t have to read that…..he is screwed up and blames everyone but himself. You’re welcome.

Ahhh, so he’s a narcissist. Thank you for the cliff notes.

Lolz wtf

Payers for peace.

You kind of look like a worse Hunter Biden

Is it the pink hair?

I pray for ya man. You sound like you are close to the bottom. If your own parents chose to help your wife(ex), it sounds like you need to reassess your life choices and break down what’s at the root of your problems. I think you have the answer already.

I’m going to screen shoot this before it’s gone.

I'm still trying to figure out what the heck i just read.

WTAF was that about? I feel significantly dumber after attempting to decipher that [censored].

Me too

We all do

If hope you find some peace.

I encourage y’all to check out the IG profile.

It’s dope head jibberish your not supposed to understand it

I hope you get it turned around in 2024.

I’ll give you a chance to double your money, I’ll take Sawhorse for $1000 in a guitar contest.

This is like the meth version of Tyrone Biggums

40 yard dash riding the guitar like a hobby horse?

Man that was a hard read.
Feel bad for this guy.
There’s no recovery when you hit the real bottom.

Lost my longest living friend from three years old to sixty last year.
Finally ran his truck into a concrete pillar on 820.
He was just out of hope.

Here's why I wrote this here:

It's of course for me. I leave tidbits here and there for history. I left here and came back.

It's kind of like the disability community I also left and checked on again. Same thing. Mothers can't provide medicine for their kids, so Bayer hooks them up and turns them into drug dealers. If you don't agree with six (6) people being between you and your medication, well, bye.

So the best part is I've actually already hit rock bottom and I look around and what I see is what I learned very well growing up.

Following in the path of Jesus Christ is a lot easier said than done. Materialism, status, caring what people think about you when you know your soul and motivations are pure - I'm not claiming to be Jesus, I'm saying I finally met a couple people that showed me it is POSSIBLE to LIVE AND ACT like him. I received the grace.

Here's the funny part: yeah, I'm on drugs - TRT specifically - and I cured a 20 year infection that medical science can't explain. I'll make a post here just for it to share all the pictures.

I saved my own life and because of that I know my worth to help others. I have been blessed more than you can probably ever comprehend, and I do not take it lightly.

The reason you can't keep up? God didn't give you the gifts he gave me, and if he did, you [censored] wasted them. Time to gather the evidence.

Mark my words by this time next year Tarrant County / FWPD will not have a single horse in their department due to compensating me for abuse and torture.

Did you really burn through 77k in the last year? Did you ever get any SS assistance?

Have you tried to get a job? Save and get a place that you can live at long term?
It appears you like to bounce around and live in short term places. Do you know that may not be the best way forward for you? Getting a regular job will give you satisfaction. Get work on time and be the best employee you can.

I hope you turn things around. Ask someone who you trust to give you an honest opinion and try to improve on that, IMO.
Best wishes.

"Guitar Contest"? Is that like a "rap off"?

Who are the judges? What are the parameters to suggest who wins the Guitar off? I can play. I might get in on this.

Lets throw down fellas... RJ is calling for a "Guitar Contest"!! Musicians cannot back down from a Guitar off!

My credit score dropped after reading this.

Introduction to subprime lenders

I’m so excited that 6 string mercury is back!

Based on how insane you are, you should probably get tested for syphilis. That may be the decades long infection that science can’t explain.

You lost me at Well, .....

I got to the part about the wifey gaining another 25 lbs... I out on all fat fk stories.

I think I'm in pretty good shape after reading a few of these threads

He made the challenge last time he showed up here, and immediately disappeared. I don’t remember what the rules were but he didn’t make any money lol.

Didn't he find Sam Bass ?