Made my girlfriend pee in a cup. Hey they were biting.

2 girls one c..... Oh never mind

Fun fishing Choke Canyon with a buddy and he was wearing me out that day. We were both catching fish but he had already put two DD's in the boat along with several more in the 5 - 7 range. He hooked up with another big fish, looked about 8 to me, and as I leaned out to net the fish I pulled the big fat cigar out of my mouth and touched the lit end to his line. You know how long it takes a hot cigar to burn through 20 lb mono? About a half second!

Great reply Doug!

Yeah, you should spend more time in the OT.

now that's MEAN!!! you win!

I took a picture of someone dropping a big tree in Fork a while back. It happened so fast I couldn't believe my eyeballs. Kudos to the gentleman that dropped it quick, tore out of the area, then came flying back in 5 minutes later to see who might have gone over to check it out. The other two boats waited until you had left the second time. I waited until complete darkness.

https://i.imgur.com/9rDXety.png?1

Greatness right here

One time I was fishing in some submerged willows near the back of a cove while a high school tournament was going on. A guy brought his HS team to the back of the cove and one of the kids in particular was casting closer than he should have been. I told the captain “It’s a big lake” and he took offense. I reminded him that he should be setting a better example for the boys.

They left soon after and I’ve always regretted saying those things, especially since one of the boys could have been his son. I’ve had guys come closer, even other HS teams, and I’ll usually just shrug it off as part of the “fun” and ask how they’re doing. I’ve never regretted taking the high road.

I was on Ray Hubbard fishing the rip-rap and two jet skies were zipping around making it difficult. I had come from the north side of 30 a few minutes earlier and knew there was a game warden sitting over there in his boat.
I finally got tired of the jet skies, so I fired up the big motor and baited them into jumping my wakes. Once they were having a good time. I went under 30 and punched it went about 100 yards and turned around, started heading south again.
The jet skies followed me and started jumping my wake and the Game Warden lit them up. I sat by the bridge and watched the Warden write them tickets.

When I still lived in California, my bass club had a tourney on Clear Lake the same day that one of the larger regional tournament organizations was holding theirs. We were fishing about half-way up a dead-end slough, my boater was flipping a jig and I was pitching a Senko when a boat in the other tournament came up behind us. One of the guys in the other boat said, "We're fishing a tournament, we need to fish this slough." I said we are too, a club tournament with about a dozen boats. He said, "We have a lot of money on the line, we're going to fish this slough." I said that our little bit of club money, and any points we got, were just as important to us as yours is to you, you can go around but we are not gonna stop fishing. They got pizzed and went around us a little closer than they should have. We let them go and proceed to keep fishing, picking apart every bit of cover apart while they burned the bank on up toward the end of the slough. they got to the end, turned around and started back down the slough, still beating the bank. About the time they got to about 20 yards from us I pitched my Senko into a small pocket in the tules and a 7.13 lb'er nailed it. We got the fish in the boat, I held it up for them to see, and said, "Hey, y'all missed one!" They turned their heads the other way and slunk out of there without making another cast.

Took the ex to Sandlin on day when the lake first opened up. She came out of the house wearing a 1 piece bathing suit. I told her that was a bad idea but she insisted on wearing it. This was before any development and the trees were so thick you couldn't get to the bank. Guess what, she had to go #2. She refused to basically strip naked in the boat or on the bank. After a couple of hours, I finally convinced her to jump in the water and let go in her bathing suit. Kept her out of the boat for years.

I'm filing 90 percent of this thread in the fiction category

I’m a nice guy. I don’t do mean things.

Don't know either one of y'all, but just couldn't resist