Porch Pirates

This is getting more common every year. Many thieves think the penalty for this crime is a mere slap on the wrist. I was surprised to learn that even if the package comes UPS, it is still considered mail theft, and can result in Federal charges.


https://kutv.com/news/local/package-thefts-could-mean-federal-prison-hefty-fine

As I said elsewhere just save your Amazon boxes. Drop a deuce in them, tape them back up and place on your porch.

You are a special kind of sick man. Don't ever change!!

I have been told they get the same protection as mail carriers, so if you mess with them you could have the Postal Inspector paying you a visit.

In the Dallas news- in the last few days, they nailed a guy in Farmers Branch with a bunch of stolen packages.
That was pretty much his full time job, stealing packages and selling the stuff on line.

I'm surprised one of these porch thieves hasn't been shot. Pretty gutsy especially with all the guns people have these days. Sooner or later ...............

I wonder if it's against the law to send a snake via UPS? If it's legal, have someone send you a rattler or two.

An exploding box of dung would be great

Last year my wife caught a high school kid trying to steal a box of medicine she had shipped ups. He was lucky I wasn't home, he just got away with a lecture from my wife.

I live in the sticks. Not an issue. Other than the delivery man always seems to show up when I am taking a dump. My dogs go nuts.

I don't have that problem. The drivers here often just slow down, and throw your stuff out in the drive way.

Depends on the order. I had a Fed EX man knocking on the door yesterday delivering a laptop. Laptop I needed to sign for evidently. Mid glory.

Probably had a High Claim Value, or Insured in the bar code on its label. Even the Post Office seems to be more careful with highly insured items.

All good. But bad timing. First world problems.

Dirty lowlife thieves, i wish very bad things upon them

There was that story a couple weeks ago of somebody stealing 4K worms from a lady with reptiles.

Amazon shipped my bandsaw the other day in its original box and left it on the porch the other day

No. No they aren’t. I’m pretty sure they used the Lowrance that I shipped to coach der Nazi as a wheel chock. They destroyed it. And I had it “insured”, which they continue to deny my claim, and I continue to appeal.

Video doorbell is the best defense. Packages never sit more than a min or two before we bring them in.

He does not drive this very often. Since he moved in we haven't had any package issues on our street haha.

I would suggest this is as good as a ring doorbell.

He’d have been dead if I caught him.

They're even stealing those, now. (This is old news, but I'm sure it's still applicable.)


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_BaQjt4DjM

check this out

https://youtu.be/LqKPrLHmvRA

Wow, what do you get through the mail that is so valuable you will kill someone over it?
I might put a pellet in his a$$, but killing someone over a package is pretty strong.

There's a few videos on youtube of porch pirates getting busted.
One guy has a similar charged package with a bunch of flour in it that bursts out all over the thief.

But murder though bruh?

years ago there was a rash of wheels getting stolen off boat trailers at Guntersville launch ramps.....but the guys doing it picked the wrong two guys to steal from.....after these two had their wheels stolen,they put new tires/rims on their trailer,waited couple weeks then launched their boat,went down the lake just our of sight then beached their boat and walked back to the ramp and hid in the woods.....later that day 3 guys drove up in a car,jumped out and started taking wheels off the trailer and the two guys hiding in the woods opened up on them with shotguns and bird shot....
my source for this story told me that stopped the thievery at boat ramps for a long time...

wish they would make it legal to do that without fear of a lawsuit....I think it would be a lot more fun than shooting some poor old deer out of a treestand….

I weaseled out of a ticket once at the ramp. I'd loaned out my trailer license plate, hadn't gotten back yet, but went to the lake anyway.
When I pulled the boat out of the water, a cop pulled up. He looked at me, looked at the trailer,,,, In my most surprised voice,
I told him, "I had a plate on it when I got here". Whew, I got away with it.

I reject this line of thinking.
You shouldn't be asking the crime victim whether it's worth it to kill someone over some property.
You should be asking the criminal whether it's worth it to die for some property.

I agree with that line of thinking.
However; I'd read all the large and small print in the state's justifiable homicide laws first,
before I did something that might cost me a few years in the big house.

Lethal force is legal in Texas in protection of one's property is my understanding.

Correct, but you probably gonna have to pay up to $50K in legal fees

When I received my LTC after Sutherland Springs, our instructor vehemently repeated the discussion about actually pulling the trigger and repercussions you will face if you, in fact, do so. It just shouldn’t be that way. Makes the good guy seem like the bad guy in trying to protect his and the family’s lives and property......

I am pretty sure if you shot someone taking a package from your doorstep you are going to prison.

No way I take a life for stealing. only way I shoot is if my life is in eminent danger.

Agree with that completely

And, If you just beat the [censored] out of the thieve, you would probably face harsher penalties than if you shot him dead.

This^^^

I get a notification from Ring everyday about a package stolen.

Think a mace bomb would be easy enough to rig? I feel like a box of duece ain't gonna do it.

The next time the wife wants to have a garage sale. I think I'll just pack it all up in Amazon boxes and let the porch pirates haul it off for free....

people act like they are living in the wild west. There is a reason you don't kill people for misdemeanor crimes. What if its the neighbors dumb kid? what if its your dumb kid stealing beer from someone's garage frig?

That's why you need lots of ammo.

Brilliant!

USPS makes sure porch pirates don't bother in my neighborhood. This is how my new rod got delivered today.

Randomly came across this a few minutes ago and came to post it. It’s awesome.