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Church Squirrels #13843591 01/12/21 07:35 PM
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a777pilot Offline OP
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The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about their squirrel infestation. After much prayer and consideration, they concluded that the squirrels were predestined to be there, and they should not interfere with God’s divine will.

At the Baptist church, the squirrels had taken an interest in the baptistry. The deacons met and decided to put a water-slide on the baptistry and let the squirrels drown themselves. The squirrels liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim, so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week.

The Lutheran church decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God’s creatures. So, they humanely trapped their squirrels and set them free near the Baptist church. Two weeks later, the squirrels were back when the Baptists took down the water-slide.

The Episcopalians tried a much more unique path by setting out pans of whiskey around their church in an effort to kill the squirrels with alcohol poisoning. They sadly learned how much damage a band of drunk squirrels can do.

But the Catholic church came up with a more creative strategy! They baptized all the squirrels and made them members of the church. Now they only see them at Christmas and Easter.

Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue. They took the first squirrel and circumcised him. They haven’t seen a squirrel since.


Look! Up in the sky. It's a bird. It's a plane. No, it's an EMP!

Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13843596 01/12/21 07:38 PM
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RATZ Online Happy
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Lol


If God is your co-pilot then change seats

https://abaltcustomlures.com/



[Linked Image][Linked Image][Linked Image]
Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13843600 01/12/21 07:40 PM
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Spiderman Offline
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I like it!


The Truth is six of the seven Dwarfs are not Happy!
Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13843604 01/12/21 07:42 PM
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BigDozer66 Offline
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banana


2016 Ranger RT188 Charcoal Metallic Dual Console
2017 Yamaha 115 VMAX SHO (VF115LA) SS Prop
Minn Kota Ultrex i-Pilot Link 45" 80 lb.
Humminbird Helix 10 Mega SI BalZout Console
Humminbird Helix 10 Mega SI BBT Bow Mount
Trick Step

[Linked Image]
Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13843608 01/12/21 07:42 PM
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happy8

Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13843621 01/12/21 07:50 PM
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Siberman Online Content
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Ok , time for somebody to post the "Mississippi Squirrel Revival" video .

Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13843625 01/12/21 07:54 PM
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Curt0407 Online Content
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thumb

Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13843630 01/12/21 07:57 PM
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Bigbob_FTW Online Content
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A+!


[Linked Image][Linked Image] FJB
Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13843651 01/12/21 08:08 PM
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thrashfish Online Content
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angel

Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13843659 01/12/21 08:10 PM
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JCG57 Offline
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Nice. Try posting it on Facebook and see if your crime is as serious as trying to sell some bullets.

Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13845456 01/14/21 01:54 AM
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a777pilot Offline OP
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I did post it on Facebook. So far I'm not in jail.


Look! Up in the sky. It's a bird. It's a plane. No, it's an EMP!

Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13845466 01/14/21 02:04 AM
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outfishdya Offline
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Nuts


Woke up this morning
Got yourself a gun....
Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13845474 01/14/21 02:16 AM
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Stump jumper Offline
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It this the Jewish squirrel? [Linked Image]


2200 Bay Champ/200 Mercury Optimax
2017 Tundra TSS 4x4 Crewmax 5.7L
Re: Church Squirrels [Re: a777pilot] #13845475 01/14/21 02:17 AM
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Coach Hark Online Content
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Just a squirrel trying to get a nut.


Whether you think you can or you can't, you're right

http://constantpursuitoutfitters.com/






Re: Church Squirrels [Re: Stump jumper] #13845514 01/14/21 03:02 AM
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PowerLizard Online Content
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Originally Posted by Stump jumper
It this the Jewish squirrel? [Linked Image]

That is a Baker Mayfield college squirrel!

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