Why My Kids Won't Be Shooting Up Schools

This is from a post on Facebook I was shown. This man sums it up perfectly.


Why My Kids Won't Be Shooting Up Schools, and How to Spot Those Who Might....

I know this is going to [censored] several of you off, and you're going to comment that it's insensitive and too soon. I appreciate your opinion and you can kindly take your opinions elsewhere.

I'm sick. I'm sick of shootings. I'm sick of children dying. I'm sick of guns being blamed. I'm sick of parents mourning over unnecessary deaths.

For 11 years, I walked alongside teenagers. Tens of thousands of kids from all across this country. So before you say "you don't know what you're talking about," please understand I'm the guy that had anywhere from 50 to over 200 students in his home on any given weekend. I'm the guy that is more involved in the local school system than almost anyone you'll meet. I write this less than 24 hours home from the Special Olympics. So please, pardon the profanity and passion and read.

There is a epidemic in our laps and everyone is refusing to see the blatant, obvious truth.

My son is in sports.

I am focusing on my son because shootings are carried out by boys.

My son is in sports.
Why? He is in sports to understand the value of others.
He is in sports to understand the value of a team.
He is in sports to LOSE.
Yes, he needs to lose. He does NOT get participation trophies. When he loses, he loses.

Kids are not being allowed to lose. Entire generations of young boys are being coddled and made to believe that the world is a bubble of preference and that their comfort is our responsibility. We are so hell-bent on being politically correct and respecting everyone that, as a result, we are no longer raising men.

A vast majority of school shootings are carried out by teenage boys who are not involved in sports or any extra-curricular activities, but rather isolated fetishes that promote the dopamine hit of violence and control.

This isn't me trying to say video games and [censored] are bad... but for f*cks sake... our boys need to lose. Our boys need to understand the rules of the game and respect boundaries.

I want you to look closely in the picture... What is it that catches your eye?

What is the CATALYST for knowing that my son will not be one you catch on the news for violence?

Are you seeing it?

It's me.

I'M A PRESENT FATHER.

The common denominator of all these kids that are shooting up schools?

It's all over their facebooks. Weird stuff: clothing, guns, warnings....

Their classmates know they had issues. Hell, some even told their parents. Some call the school. Nothing is done.

And the common denominator?

The parents had "no idea."

The kids didn't speak up or weren't listened to.

Here is my promise to you, Stetson.

I will not be up your butt.

You are going to live your life, make your mistakes, take your lumps, and become an AMAZING MAN OF INTEGRITY.

But listen... While I won't be up your butt,

You better believe I'm gonna be knee deep in your sh*t.

I'm committed to being your FATHER.

That's not your friend.

That's not your punching bag.

That's not a provider that you never see.....

I am going to be PRESENT, ALWAYS.

I am going to PRESIDE over you and teach you how to become the MAN you're called to be.

I am not going to leave you to yourself to "find your own version of yourself and what being a 'man' means to you..."

You deserve BETTER... every boy does.

I will TEACH you how to lose and learn.

I will TEACH you how to dream and work.

I will TEACH you how to add value and make money.

I will TEACH you how to treat a woman.

I will TEACH you what a gun is and what it's for.

I will TEACH you what it is to be a PRESENT FATHER.

I will TEACH you what it is to be a MAN.

And you, son, will be the PROTECTOR of yourself, your family, and your community....

Because you will know that is who we, as MEN, are called to be.

Share that,facebook.

Or get upset.

I'm out.

Spot on

Cliff notes. Teach your kids to love, not hate.

Great read

It's called deliberate parenting. We need more of them.

yep.. And thats why my kids didn't shoot other kids!

Well put!And I'm out!

I watched a 6th grader hold his moms hand into the woman’s bathroom today at tball game it was pathetic

What? Now, if this kid has some sort of learning disability, okay, but otherwise...WHAT?!?!

No, there is more to it than a simpleton motto.

A major problem in our society summed up right there

Nope perfectly normal as far as I can tell except you can’t pry a phone out of his hands or iPad

Well said !! Phones , Internet and Video Games are raising some kids these days. Some parents don't give two cents about what their kids are doing as long as they are not bothering them.

I think you missed THE MOST IMPORTANT part.
We need God back in school.

What I see in young people is

1 in 10 have work ethic
1 in 10 have any sort of true leadership skills
1 in 10 look at facts before forming an opinion
1 in 10 understand what commitment actually is
1 in 10 understand even basic directions or know north south east or west means

I could go on and on, but soon this is their world , soon they will chart the course and all of us will simply be senile old people that reminisce about the old days.

American society is at a cross road that is perilously close to an abyss of despair, if the insanity cannot be stemmed I don’t care to see the results of the dominion of the millennial.

< 1 in 10 attend church on a regular basis.

Well said. However, those of us who do get involved and teach our children cannot wait for those who don’t to finally come around. We must protect our children now! If your school does not have proper security then go to the school board meetings and raise hell!!! There is no excuse for this now.

Amen brother.

Yep and yep....... whether you attend church or not, whether you believe or not, there is a moral issue in this country and slow fade to where we are numb to so many things as a society. Going to church never hurt anyone to hear about others above yourself and serving others. Having a moral compass is a good thing and this mindset of "I make my own rules and decide what's right and what's wrong" is exactly what has gotten us to where we are today.

Since I'm a teacher I see first hand what lack of parenting does to the mindset of children. I have gone from a middle school teacher/coach to head baseball coach in a 5A school and now back in middle school.

The reason, children with a horrible home life that you can reach and possibly help their future, has gone from a 16-18 year old down to 12-15 year old children. I went back in 2002 to middle school because my wife and I saw a need where we thought we could make a difference. She moved back to the middle school in 2005 and we've been there ever since.

Trying to impart change through our FCA (Fellowship of Christian Athletes) program in the middle school has shown huge progress in number of students reached but we only can wait and see if it really impacted their life.

Another poster mentioned the amount of hate in the world. This is at the forefront of our theme this year in FCA, "Love Comes to Life." We see it daily in our students and how they treat one another. Call it what you want but two areas of concern need to be addressed before this changes, Social Media and Video Games.

If what you hear and see and partake in daily are nothing but hate filled messages, games and ideas, you will emulate those exact actions in your life.

I've seen it deteriorate to the point Administration does nothing to help teachers or students. I know I'm stepping on some toes of some administrators that visit this site, but its true. Until you as an administrator hold the parent accountable for the action of the student, nothing will change and violence will increase. If things don't change at home, don't expect any type of change at school.

On another note, some parents are simply dead beats who care less about what happens to their children. Those kids have an uphill battle that few win, 80% fall into the same trap as their parents and the cycle continues. Those are the kids I really feel sorry for because they've never been given an opportunity to live in a structured environment that shows love and caring so now they have an understanding of what REAL PARENTING looks like and can pass this along to their kids.

Dimitrios Pagourtzis was in sports.


Which religion would you officially have in schools?

Also an active member of his church.

Not about religion it is about grace through faith. Eph 2:8 is a start to a walk that can change your life.

Please remember, grace is freely given, acceptance of that grace through faith is all dependent upon the individual. It can't be forced upon anyone.

More death has been caused by religion throughout world history by having it forced upon them than the entire loss of life in any world war.

Never mind. You guys who are adamantly against anything of any religion don’t want to listen to the point which actually has nothing to do with religion. Enjoy your candidate Oprah in 2020. Ya’ll can celebrate with all your lib friends.

People who want religion in their school have that option today via private schools. Religion is also not banned at public schools. If some kids want to gather for a bible study nothing is stopping them.

When I went to school, we had a picture of the Pope in every classroom and we never had a mass shooting

Let’s try that then

My post wasn't even remotely a pro religion post. I cannot accurately verify whether war or religion has caused more deaths or atrocities but will say both have caused plenty in this world.

I am saying that society in general isn't raising men with a spine. If you look at every one of these shooters they are spineless garbage with no moral compass or healthy mental resolve.

The dad that is too busy playing Xbox when he should be teaching his son core values needs his [censored] beat. The dad that ditches his wife for a new hot piece and then we have a broken home needs his [censored] beat. If a kid is just a bad apple regardless of parenting which does happen then with any luck at all the judicial system and its abundance of already on the books laws if enforced will deal with him.

I will also say this, the media sensationalizing this type of event does not help. These cowards are potential copy cats notching their spot in history. What may help is if we stop the wussification of Law enforcement visa vi the 8 years of Obama the awful and start properly dealing with scum like the dogs they are maybe the tide will turn.

It’s a very complex problem and there are no simple solutions. Reading through the various posts, I believe there’s at least some degree to merit to every thought on “why it’s happening”. It’s everything mentioned and more...it all contributes.

I firmly believe there is no feasible approach to eliminate school shootings. Make no mistake, there are ways to eliminate them - but no way is feasible. So they’ll keep occurring at an unabated pace until there is at least some agreement on:
A) What is the goal?
B) What are we willing to do to achieve the goal?
C) What actions are we willing to take in order to achieve the goal?

In theory, there’s clear consensus on A listed above. But in practice there isn’t! There isn’t because A is a function of B. If we’re truly not willing to do whatever it may be to achieve the stated goal, then we’ve listed the wrong goal.

So for the foreseeable future we’ll churn arguments around #2 and #3 listed above. (Pro-gun, anti-gun, hot air, political footballs...etc.)

We have to figure out what we (as a society) really want, and then align on what we’re willing to do to achieve it?

Yep. Right on Frank. You can't convince a liberal mind of anything outside the realm of emotion.

If it would work, I would vote for it and I'm not Catholic.

Even the Pope drives around in an armored Popemobile, which is more effective than thoughts and prayers.

Did a bit of research.

Whether it’s shooting up a school, theater or whatever, they are mentally ill psycopaths or some variation. These are not normal people who didn’t get enough whippings, bad parenting or missed Sunday school.

Parents may have been able to intervene at an earlier age but these things don’t start manifesting in obvious ways until the mind is formed. Plus it can be a subtle progression in adolescence. It may be difficult for parents to see or they don’t want to see. There may also be hardly any parenting. But in the end the kid has his wires crossed in a way that makes him dangerous and subject to a cocktail of influences and triggers.

Combinations of abuse, sensational news headlines of shooters, video games, social media, internet, violence in media, depression, self esteem etc are triggers or like influences to someone who is already psychopathic.

Normal people can experience all of those things and not go committ mass murder. But for a truly crazy person, as these shooters are, they can create a path to some twisted glory or satisfaction.

This is what I see a lot of. Even the "involved" parents don't have parenting skills. They're raising kids who can't (or won't) do anything for themselves.

I see this with my nephews, cousins' kids and their friends. The parents are involved and attentive, but the kids don't do anything for themselves. They can't get in a car without help. They can't pack their own backpacks. They can't walk more than 10 feet. They can't fix a plate for themselves. They can't hardly open a door.

Went to a kid's birthday party at a park, many parents with a bunch of 10-12 year olds, and many of the kids had their hotdogs served to them with the parents acting like waiters at a country club scared they could get fired with one word from a rich snob member. "Do you want ketchup? How much? Mustard? Chips? Do you want me to open your chips and put them on your plate?" The kids would just grunt an answer while staring at their phone or act like they were being put upon for having to issue instructions to the help. It was pathetic.

I was in a car with my cousin and we were picking up her son who was 14. There was a bunch of stuff in the seat on the side of the car he normally gets in. He was walking up to the car and she actually said, "Oh no, he's going to be upset when he can't sit there, I hope it's OK for him to sit on the other side. How will he get in?" I said, "Tell him to go around to the other side." She looked at me like I had just suggested we tie him to the hood. Funny thing was, he opened the door and I told him to go around, and he did just like a normal person would...but if he had expressed any displeasure she certainly would have jumped out and rearranged everything so he would be happy for the 3-minute ride home.

And if I didn't do these things when I grew up, I literally got my a55 BEAT by a WW2 Marine Vet.

.

Thankfully you were allegedly normal to start with.

Yes, he sums up what I have thought and said in other threads. Kids these days have no idea how to handle rejection, failure or other unplanned and unfortunate events that may take place in their lives. They are being coddled to a point that they expect everything to fall in their lap, then when it doesn't the flip out. The values of hard work, try and try again until you succeed ,failure is not an option..... are things of the past and no longer driving points for people to rise to that "next level" in whatever they are doing. It is always somebody else's fault now. Can't be them, kids want rewards now without doing any of the work.

Where he is most correct, is with the parents involvement. Everybody is so tied to their phones, ipads, computers and being online that they have no idea how to communicate and engage with friends and family or even strangers.

I think the death of this world is the smartphones. They have artificially replaced the basics skills and behaviors that were once just natural and programmed into us.

While I agree on some of these things, playing sports isn't necessarily high on my priority list. I'm a high school coach and I see parents act a fool when their kid doesn't get playing time. Some of these parents want their kids rewarded for doing nothing and the kids could care less. But maybe that's just parenting in general. Either way, I've had a rough year as far as having parents jump on my ### about kids that are terrible and their playing time, or lack thereof.

The point is kids need something to teach them grit. Something that allows them to push themselves to the point of failure. They can then learn to tolerate a little discomfort and how to handle failure. It can be sports or any other variety of "hard thing to do." The essence of the original post is pretty spot on in my mind.

For those blaming it on a lack of religious teaching in school, you are being wildly naive. It's all fun and games until they start teaching something you don't agree with. Considering there are thousands of sects of Christianity and many billions of non Christians in the world, it would go real bad real quick if you got your way. I also find it ironic the same guys who view the second amendment as unassailable seem to have no problem ignoring the separation of church and state laid out in the first amendment.

Also, it's entirely possible to be a conservative and non-religious. These people do exist. Some of them are even downright decent dudes!

<Sigh>

‘Separation of church and state’ is not in the Constitution. It is in a personal letter from Thomas Jefferson to a pastor.

Right. And the supreme court has ruled that Jefferson's comments are the most authoritative commentary on the scope and effect of the first amendment. "A wall between church and state."

Kids need to be educated on religion and morals at home.

<sigh>

And the writer is saying, sports help because they will help teach his son teamwork and how to lose. If the parents are hell-bent on their kids playing, even though they are terrible, then the parents have no intention of teaching their child the value of a team, how to lose or any other lessons. They are just reinforcing the behavior of "pitch a fit until you get what you want without putting in the work" attitude. I think he is referring to using sports as a tool to reinforce values he he is trying to instill in his son.

My hat is off to you for dealing with parents like that. I have said many times, I am pretty nervous about, one day, coaching my son's sports team because of the way I saw parents act while I was playing ball. I am excited for those days but am also preparing myself for the insanity of the parents.

The Supreme Court opening... "God save the United States and this honorable court."

are 2nd amendment guys REALLY going to start talking about what was actually meant by separation??? WOW just WOW
you can cut the hypocrisy with a knife!! its soo thick.

Frank.... I am sure this wasn't directed to me because I am not a straight line "lib" or "Conservative". Because that is the politics of this. And a two party system keeps a balance. The pendulum should not swing too far either way. We are all Americans and to resort to name calling is beneath you.