I got to thinking earlier, and then grandpa solidified it. Whatever happened to the long lost art of visiting?

Now, note, my parents were born in 1915 and 1923.. so while I'm just 32, I was raised with older sets of values and the way people acted towards each other.

I remember when I was a kid, we'd go over to their friends houses, and play card games or dominoes or something and talk. Everybody sitting around the kitchen table, catching up on everything that's going on. It was quality time. If you were the host, you would have something for the guests to eat, and ... I dunno where we got this tradition, but you gave your guests something. Whether it was food, or drink, or just a little something. Guests would invariably give the host a gift... something small.. it doesn't have to be anything, but SOMETHING, help the hostess clear the table if there was a meal, and get ready for the game.

It simply was the way things were done. It was the host's duty to make sure that everyone was comfortable, well fed, the house was clean, etc.

Now I have friends my age, and while I can't help my manners, I wonder at theirs sometimes. Entertainment isn't everyone sitting in front of the tv and not talking. Entertaining your guests certainly isn't having them sit there and watch you play your video game. And it is the height of rudeness to eat in front of a guest and offer them nothing. I just wonder what happened. I wouldn't dream of breathing a word to my friends how much it can grate on me, but at the same time... what happened between the generation that raised me, and the 30somethings today?

I still visit a lot of people. I never really go to their house but I still make an effort to have lunch or call them up. I usually spend one day a month going through my phone to catch up with all my friends I havent talked to in a while.

I agree with you so much. The problem is that the current generation is moving to fast and they need to slow down. I remember when I was in elementary school, when school got out I went to my grandparents house. and at 5pm we had supper, then we all cleaned up the kitchen (I say we it was my g-ma, g-pa, ad me, then my cousin came in later years) then we would around 5:30ish go get folding chairs and sit in the drive way and watch the neighborhood. Some folks would be walking and would stop and chat there was one old guy who annoyed my grandparents so much he lived about 5 houses down and he would walk down every evening and chat for a bit. During this time I would sometimes sit with them or I would ride my bike around the area or just play in the drive way so i could be close to my grandpa. He was the world to me. Many of evenings I would set a cup up at the end of the drive way and get my ole zebco 33 out and just tie on a bell sinker and practice casting and tring to hit that cup. That's why I can cast so well today, just cant catch worth a dam.

Thank you Kattelyn for bringing up that, and making me remember some of the happiest times of my life.

same here RATZ

when I was in 1st thru about 5th grade I would take the bus to my grandparents' place until my parents got off of work. My grandma usually had a batch of fresh sourdough bread ready and supper wasnt too long after. He had about 11 acres and a couple of horses I would ride almost everyday. I would spend almost all summer with them. They were just right down 175 from where my parents lived. They both passed away when I was in Jr high and highschool so I didnt get to spend much time with them. Recently we sold the land because the taxes were getting so high and the person that bought it bulldozed everysingle bit of it, including the house, then burned it. He's now selling it to a bunch of developers. It makes us sick when we have to drive past it. It still was the best years of my life.

Ratz, you hit on something else that people used to do and just makes me wonder why we don't do them any more.

My family would also sit out on the porch and just enjoy being outside. We lived way out in the country, but at my aunts' houses, we would sit out and enjoy the evening, chat with the neighbors, get to know folks.

People complain so much about how they don't know their neighbors, but they don't do anything to meet them. I read somewhere not too long ago that kids have vitamin D deficiencies... what the heck? How is that possible? Vitamin D is what you get simply from sun! Its because people don't want their kids going outside alone (which I think is absolute bupkus) and they don't want to get off the couch and go be outside with them.

Times are changing guys, no doubt about it. Same here, when I was younger we would all meet at grandma's every Sunday for dinner, aunts,uncles and cousins. We'd all catch up on things, have a big Sunday dinner (Italian of course), afterward the women would clean up while the men talked about anything and everything and the cousins would all go outside to play.
I think it's more of a generational thing. We had the baby boomers, generation X, gen-Y and now it seems it the Me generation. The world is becoming a horrible place.

The world that you live in is your choice. How do you perceive things? How do you act towards others, and how do you require they act towards you?

In my mind, It is a generational thing. My generation was raised with video games, with sitting at home and watching tv. Therefore, they believe that is "entertainment". Far too few know how to entertain themselves without all the gadgetry.

Frank, what you describe is pretty much what happened for all the holidays and the yearly birthday shindig with my family.. although we were Irish-Texan. We'd all show up at usually my aunt Sissy's house, the women would all bustle off to the kitchen and chatter, us kids would be thrown outside, and the men would be in the living room with football on and usually playing some kind of game.

I can't tell you how many times I would wake up in the middle of the night when we were visiting my aunts and they and mama would be sitting at the kitchen table drinking tea and playing some kind of card game and chattering away. Rarely did we ever do anything involving a tv.

Kinda reminds me of a story/joke that's appropriate.
Grandma moved into a new apartment building, so on Sunday we were going for dinner and a visit. Needing directions we phoned ahead and spoke with grandma. (read this in your best Italian accent):
"I'ma live at tree-ten Washinton Street, apartmenta tree-oh-one. When you gedda here open the gate widda you elbow and I buzzes you inside. The elevata is ona you left, widda you elbow pusha da button. Whena she opens go inside and widda you elbow pusha tird floor. Come up and I see you, my apartmenta is ona da left."
I asked grandma"Why must I used my elbow".
Her reply was classic:
"Wadda you gonna come empty handed?".

One of my fondest memories was once each month all the farm neighbors, as we said, friends up and down the river, would get together to play 7 point pitch on a Sat. night. I was too young to play but no radio, no TV, just visiting with neighbors and having a good time.

I guess it's carried over a little bit to our house now because when we get together as a family, only a couple of people are watching TV while the rest of us are gathered around the kitchen table having a very competitive game of Wizard.

When is the last time you saw a front porch on a house in the suburbs that was close enough to the street to talk to people passing by? How many neighbors do you see out in the eveings taking a stroll and saying hi to their friends?
There are a myriad of reasons why. No one strolls, if they are even out they are in their jogging clothes running past your house with the ipod buds stuck in their ears.
With all the bad news we get 24 hours a day from all media sources most of us are pretty shy about meeting our neighbors;who knows what child molester or serial killer lives next door? You can't trust anyone anymore.
How many of you know your next door or next street over neighbors well enough to invite them into your house for dinner?
I have lived in this trailer park about 7 years and I seldom see my neighbor beside me unless I am mowing and he wants to visit a bit.
I don't even want to know the rest of them. The trailer in front of me has had more strange people in than I have ever run into before. I heard some noise yesterday and looked out the window to see a recliner and couch get thrown out the door then both the occupants get in their cars and leave.
Got some other strange neighbors I swear came out of the twilight zone. Strange Strange people.
When I was married it was different. EX wife had 12 brothers and sisters and inlaws that would visit and we would visit them. She was friends with some of the people I worked with and we would get together for a barbque or cards of games sometimes.
Now I work nights, live alone, and use weekends to catch up on my sleep or go fishing. Don't know anyone to visit. It's lots different when you are by your self.

That had to be either in the Off-Season or After a Husker Football game. Of course, had this been a fall Saturday, you would have had to discuss the game in its entirety before you got down to playing Wizard.

how old is Grandpa ?
gotta be in his 100's

Old enough to whup yer azz....as my daddy used to put it.

well if they are still having kids in the 60 year range, that is probably true

Good thread. Whatever happened to everyone throwing the carkeys in a bowl and everyone getting to change things up a bit?

They busted that place up in Denton, didnt they?

I ratted them out. Tossed in my keys and someone stole my car.

Kattelyn, I'm getting a game of twister together for tonight, you want to come over?

I guess some kids who think they are adults were raised a little different than us older than dirt old farts. I grew up being taught respect for my elders, respect for women, and respect for my girls friends. Hunters, soldiers, policemen, firemen, and the mailman were held in high respect. Doctors and preachers made house calls. The druggist and the banker knew your name when you walked in because his kids probably knew your kids. Moms stayed home and took care of the kids or if they had to work they worked while the kids were in school.
There was a time when Opening Day of Hunting season meant most of the boys were going to miss school. The World Series meant TV sets set up in the cafeteria and even in some of the rooms in the schools.
There were a whole different set of values back then; where now there are none.

EDited--does that make more sense?

That makes no sense.

New sig!

and it wasn't me......Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssss

Grandpa as in the gentleman who just posted.

Not tonight! You wanna be up to your elbows in masa dough?

I grew up in the stix where everybody chit chatted and knew each other and their families.I got away from that [censored] as quick as I could.

Why try to explain when they can't even read with comprehension?

'Cause I'm taking a break and have nothing else better to do?